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Thou Shalt Not Outlaw




You don’t need anti-bikie laws to arrest people for things that are already crimes. So what exactly is the point?














Truly, we are governed by some quite towering intellects.

I am in constant awe at the breadth and depth of intelligence displayed by our keepers.

It makes me feel very safe being coddled by such Mensa candidates.

And when I feel safe, I am easily enabled to purchase smart TVs, fridges that shit ice cubes, and get my Bali on with a beaut new Bintang wife-beater.

Pictured: freedom

Pictured: freedom

And that is a good thing which ensures this great country keeps prospering fiscally while second-world sinks like Cyprus are used to launder Russian mafia money.

So I have been watching with great interest how, in the last few years, each state has made a concerted effort to make me even safer and thereby more prosperous than I already am by banning outlaw motorcycle clubs.

To this most worthy end, the various attorney generalissimos drafted reams of legislation making it illegal to belong to or associate with any organisation that has been deemed “criminal” by a judge, who has been given top secret “evidence” by the police (evidence which the cops do not have to actually show to the accused) to make this decision.

When I first saw this, I rejoiced.

Finally, Australia was going to lead the world in locking up the herds of child-rapists sheltering within the Catholic church! O happy day! Finally, we were going to deal with an organisation so blatantly criminal and so fabulously wealthy it makes Albanian sex-slavers look like street-corner dope-dealing hooligans.

But instead of raiding monastic cloisters full of kiddy-touchers, the police directed their attentions at the outlaw motorcycle clubs. Which are, all things considered, quite easy to locate, given the members openly wear their affiliations on their backs, and hang about in clubhouses which are also clearly sign-posted. So there was probably very little police overtime involved there.

Initially, the legislation failed in South Australia when it was tested in the High Court. Great legal minds told the state governments that it would fail. The state governments went ahead anyway. The same legal minds expressed grave concerns about the legislation as a whole, given how it relied on evidence that did not have to be tested in court. The state governments put their fingers in their ears and went “Lalalalalalalala” but made some amendments to their legislation.

Eventually, the re-drafted legislation was upheld in Queensland, and in very short order, police in NSW and Victoria began to honk how they were now going to crush the outlaw motorcycle club menace and extirpate it from our society. Raids were conducted, and hundreds of charges were laid. Of course, no-one is ever told how many actual convictions resulted from these charges, which is usually bugger-all, but that’s not important. What is important is that people are made to feel safe because we know that scary-looking people are being charged with stuff.

These true crime documentaries are very informative

These true crime documentaries are very informative

Quite frankly, the whole outlaw motorcycle club menace thing is fundamentally ridiculous. Outlaw motorcycle clubs are far less a menace to society than a police force that beats drunken aborigines to death in a holding cell, or Tasers stoned biscuit thieves until they die in the street, with total impunity.

The vast majority of society would remain blissfully unaware of the existence of outlaw motorcycle clubs, if it wasn’t for the endless chants of: “Look at these horrible bastards!” emanating from the cops.

And yes, outlaw motorcycle clubs are full of horrible scary bastards. But these horrible scary bastards are pretty much only being horrible scary bastards to other horrible scary bastards, and concern themselves not at all with people shopping at Harvey Norman, eating Maccas, and going about their everyday business. Such is the nature of outlaw motorcycle clubs.

And they are most certainly not molesting your children in expensive private schools.

It was always clear to me that killing someone with an airport bollard, or shooting someone in the face with an illegal handgun were heinous crimes already addressed quite adequately by the Crimes Act. The police already had all the powers they needed to arrest and prosecute offenders who committed such crimes. And rightly so.

The issue, however, is that very few outlaws actually make any statements to the police when they are arrested. They, fundamentally, do not give a shit. This is what makes them outlaws. And, as an old lawyer mate of mine once observed, if you don’t squawk, everyone will walk. This makes the cops mental. They are at a loss when no-one is informing or confessing.

It was once incumbent upon the cops to prove the crime was committed. It was once not incumbent upon the accused to prove it was not. That is how our system worked. But not anymore. Things have changed rather dramatically in recent times, and since it has all been sold to us as a means of making us safer (and thereby more prosperous), we have pretty much all agreed that it is a “good thing”.

At the moment, an accused’s right to silence is pretty much gone, and on the basis of evidence the accused has no right to see or examine, he or she can be charged and convicted with belonging to or associating with a criminal organisation.

But what no-one in charge seems to get, which is quite amazing given how bright so many of them are, is the astonishing irony in all of this.

And the irony here is so rich it has its own tropical island staffed with teenage bikini models and gold-plated surfboards.

The government has decided to outlaw outlaws.

Yep, ’cos that’ll work.

12 Responses to Thou Shalt Not Outlaw

  1. Stephen Corby Reply

    April 10, 2013 at 4:57 pm

    This guy needs a bigger bio.

    • white proud Reply

      April 11, 2013 at 1:58 am

      fucking bikie apologist… want some drugs?… ask a bikie… mmm speed

  2. bly Reply

    April 10, 2013 at 7:58 pm

    What’s up.. don’t you want to be safe?

  3. Rob Colligan Reply

    April 10, 2013 at 7:59 pm

    Delicious irony.

  4. Bert Reply

    April 10, 2013 at 10:06 pm

    This is far to simple and true for that matter for a politician to understand
    You also want the police to actually work !!!! I mean … like …actually present a case against someone rather than hiding a camera on the back of a bridge.
    Nice idea but there’s no money in it.
    Love your work

  5. Pingback: Thou Shalt Not Outlaw

  6. Pete Reply

    April 10, 2013 at 10:48 pm

    History repeats itself.

    First they came for the Socialists, and I did not speak out–
    Because I was not a Socialist.
    Then they came for the Trade Unionists, and I did not speak out–
    Because I was not a Trade Unionist.
    Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out–
    Because I was not a Jew.
    Then they came for me–and there was no one left to speak for me.
    Martin Niemöller

  7. John Draper Reply

    April 11, 2013 at 10:37 am

    Mr Mihailovic sums the situation up beautifully. If the common sense in this man was found more commonly in other men the world would I suspect, be a far better place.


  8. J-Lo Reply

    April 13, 2013 at 8:01 pm

    Quite frankly, the whole outlaw motorcycle club menace thing is fundamentally ridiculous. Outlaw motorcycle clubs are far less a menace to society than a police force that beats drunken aborigines to death in a holding cell, or Tasers stoned biscuit thieves until they die in the street, with total impunity.


  9. michael lyons Reply

    April 15, 2013 at 12:25 pm

    I’ve been a biker for over 30yrs, been on poker runs..parties..big nights out at various scary bikie clubhouses..and never once felt like I was in imenient danger…never been threatend, harrassed or beaten…there are plenty of laws now to deal with crims..


    April 15, 2013 at 12:56 pm

    Love the part, horribly scary bastards only being horribly scary bastards to other horribly scary bastards! So true, couldn’t have been said any more perfectly! Me and the ol man ride and been to quite a few Club gatherings and Support parties and have never felt like I was in any danger. They dont give a fuck about people like you are me they give a fuck about others who live that M.C life.

  11. Roy Magoo collins Reply

    March 28, 2016 at 7:00 pm

    Gday Boris Have you missed my targeted under the skin sarcasm. Here’s a suggestion Love thy mother more than thyself. This will get you extremely closer to reality, It’s not easy son, but give it a go. Slaintha. Magoo.

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